9 weeks

  I haven't been the greatest about updating my blog. For the last couple weeks I have been super busy with work and the holiday season. We had a wonderful Christmas spent with our families. Of course I got some cute baby gifts like this one modeled by Zoe:

  If you know me you know I LOVE elephants!!!!! I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. It is with a nurse practitioner who I believe will just take a health history and get me established with the clinic. I am not sure, but I think it is to early to hear the heartbeat with the external doppler, but Brian is going to come with me just in case :)

  As far as I can tell things are going well, but then I hear stories of people who miscarry around 8 weeks and they don't find out until 12 weeks. I try not to worry, but it kind of just creeps in. I know once I hit the 12 week mark I will have a big sigh of relief and really start to enjoy it all! I continue to feel pretty good. I have notice I am more tired (if that is even possible :) ) and I have trouble brushing my teeth. I always brush my tongue when I brush my teeth which has never been a problem. These days however, it may or may not elicit a gag reflex and if I gag, I tend to spend quite a few minutes of slow breathing and swallowing :) My stomach still gets upset at times and I have food aversion, but I would not say I have nausea. My co-workers think that I may get lucky and not get morning sickness.

  I plan on putting up belly pictures when I get one, but for now I remain flat. I saw my cousin at Christmas who is 24 weeks pregnant and she had the cutest little belly! I do have to take a minute to say how wonderful Brian has been to me. He is always good to me, but lately have been doing so much to make my life easier and I cannot thank him enough. He does ALL the housework and just little things to make sure I don't have to do much. Words cannot express how blessed I am! 

Ultrasound

Brian and I had our ultrasound yesterday. I was excited and a little apprehensive as I just didn't know what it would show. When the nurse came back to get us, the first thing she said to me was "it is nice to see you smiling." They have been so great there I couldn't have asked for better care.

  Jen (the nurse) warned me ahead of time that it is right on the cusp of seeing the heartbeat as I was 6 weeks, 4 days so if Dr. Corfman didn't see the heartbeat he wouldn't be concerned. Well, if we couldn't see the heartbeat of course I would worry....I can't help it, I am a worrier.

 It was a transvaginal ultrasound like all the ultrasounds I have done for my procedure stuff, but this time it all looked different. There was a baby in there! Dr. Corfman was able to enlarge the screen and you could actually see the baby's heart beating. It was so surreal to see. He was able to measure the heart rate which was 128 beat per minute. The doctor said the baby is measuring right on track (which is actually less than an inch in size) and everything looks really good. Below is one of the ultrasound picture, it is a little blurry but you can see the baby (even though it actually looks like a blob).

  The nurse said you can tell right away when he inserts the probe if things don't look good, but they both said everything looked perfect. Although I am not totally out of the woods until after the first trimester, once they are able to detect the fetal heartbeat, the miscarriage risk goes way down. Jen was so nice and gave me two super big hugs. How do you thank these people for giving you such a special gift? For supporting you and encouraging you the whole time? I told Dr. Corfman that we couldn't thank him enough and he said to talk to him when they are teenagers :) Even the receptionist were waiting to see how the ultrasound went. They asked for me to keep in touch and send pictures and of course I will do that.

 I am still feeling pretty good. Just not really interested in food, but have been trying to eat healthy. My friend Maija just gave me a stack of books about pregnancy so I will be busy reading them (she is a great resource as she has 2 kids under 2.) I am now done with the infertility clinic and my next appt will be with the OB at 9 weeks. Although I am not positive, I am sure they wont' be doing another ultrasound until around 20 weeks, but I will find out more at my appointment. Brian and I are very excited!

6 weeks

 Today I am 6 weeks along. How do I figure? Well, we don't go by my last period because of all the IVF, we go by the date of egg retrieval. Per the clinic, they must have figured the eggs fertilized sometime on the Thursday after the retrieval, hence the date.

  A lot of people have been asking how I am feeling. In the first week after finding out I was pregnant, I downloaded some pregnancy apps. They are fun to read, but I started to read the community forums. I would read what people would post they were feeling who were around a similar time as me. I started to analyze my symptoms and realize I had little none of what they were describing. I started to get anxious and drive myself crazy. I have since stopped reading the forums and trying to analyze all my symptoms. The stress was not good and a quote from my favorite movie: "You have to accept what is," has kept me a little more sane. Brian and I want this baby so bad it hurts, but we know we are doing everything we can to keep it healthy and growing and if for some reason I miscarry, we won't look back and say we could have changed this.

  Some of the few changes I have noticed are that I pee way more often then I used to and although I have no nausea, I am just disinterested in food. I have no appetite, which if you know me, is strange. Like I said before, I will take any symptom with a smile on my face because I waited so long for this to happen and it is so worth it!

  We have an ultrasound scheduled on Monday to detect the fetal heart rate. Once the heart rate is detected, the rate of miscarriage drops to 4%. I am anxious and excited for this ultrasound. I hope we see that little heart just flying!